Really? Why?

untitledEverything happens for a reason. Does it? Well, that’s what they say. Some people say it because they don’t know what else to say while some say it because they actually believe it.  This kind of thinking is detrimental to our society. You can’t just brush things off with a meaningless statement such as this and somehow think this will explain it all away and everything will be fine because it’s part of the “plan.” Maybe some things do happen for a reason, maybe if certain things did not happen then other things would not have fallen into to place as they have. To say that everything happens for a reason is asinine and hurtful.

Get your head out of your ass and STOP SAYING THIS!

I get extremely upset when people say this to me. I was molested for 6 years. What is the reason for that?  Was it because I was stupid and made bad decisions as an infant? Some then say “you may never know” and I say bullshit! There was no reason for that to happen to me and it had nothing to do with anything I did to cause it. Then I get the famous lines, “God was there with you” or “God only gives the worst pain to his strongest warriors” and again I say bullshit! Please explain to me how that is supposed to comfort me. I guess you believe that the reason for the molestation is so I can live in torment for the rest of my life, is that what you’re saying?

What is the reason for 49 people to be gunned down in a nightclub, was it because of their bad decision to be gay?  You would probably tell the mothers of those men and women that their death will change laws or change attitudes but that is also bullshit.  Sick people will always be sick, criminals will always find a way and bigots continue to raise more bigots.

Last year I read Heaven is For Real by Colton, Sonja and Todd Burpo. I thought it was going to be a nice uplifting and spiritual experience but about halfway through I started sobbing.  I was so upset that God felt it was necessary to save this little boy while so many others just die or live in fear. What about me? I was just an innocent little girl!  What about the kids with cancer that never get a second chance and what about all those kids sold into sex slavery every day? What about the mother whose son died because of my son?  What about the children that are taken, tortured and killed?  What about the children that are starving to death and what about the children with special needs.  What are the reasons for all of them?  Was it something they did?  I can answer that, it turns out that boy and his parents lied and what’s worse is they think that’s ok because they say it gave people hope.  It didn’t give me hope, it just made me feel like I didn’t matter.

I can’t think of anything good that came of any tragedy I’ve suffered through and I feel like if you really believe the bullshit then the odds should be with me. They’re not.

Bottom line, stop saying this.

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2 thoughts on “Really? Why?

  1. People say very odd things when they don’t what else to say. \
    It took me a very long time to figure out my own beliefs and to give myself the permission to believe in them. I accept that each person has that right. Though I respect other’s beliefs, I don’t have to agree or believe the same things. That has been so freeing.

    Liked by 2 people

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